I Decided to Marry Him ... (post yg bnyk 'wow')

As I was sitting on my bed, tunggu mood nak mandi this morning ... Suddenly it just hit me, 'I'm going to marry him', and give him lots & lots of condition ... Find the perfect 'number', the I got back on my wedding planning track ...

But this entry won't be about him, or anything related to the wedding ... Because this is my personal space, something close to me ... & personal ... It's for my father ... (Wow, my eyes started watering already)

Daddie left for Lucknow, India in October ... A few days after Hari Raya, then last December he's around for a couple weeks ... That's when I dropped the news about my wedding, heheh ... He's a bit confused in the 1st place, as I'm the 1st child to get married in our family ... But in between that confusing moment, there's a few silent moment from his eyes ...

As he lived far2 away (wow, mcm fairy tales story plak), it's difficult to arrange the date ... Since I have to make it fit to daddie's working schedule, and convenient for everybody ... 1st, the engagement was planned on 12.3 (ni cubaan pertama to get engaged) ... Somehow we have to reschedule as mummy will be leaving for India to visit daddie dgn grandma ...

Then we postponed to May (2nd attemp), somehow I mengamuk2 and called it off ... Sebab my bf ade perempuan lain (wow [lagi], dramatik nyer ... Hahah, it's his crazy fan ... Who didn't stop bothering us), I'll explain it next time in other post la ... Then I gave him September, last call dah tu ... Somehow ade drama lagi, that's how we got here ... & there is another chance ...

Forget about him, it's all about my dad ... So, a few weeks after the December visit ... Daddie came up wif this planned to get retire early ... He applied, & waiting for confirmation from HQ ...

And this is what I thought ...

Of course he's not happy there, somehow he don't wanna missed all the experience on his kids' wedding ... Or maybe, it's not worth to missed all the moments ...

I'm speechless now, can't find words to put together anymore lines ...

I love you dad, I love my mum equally (in case she wonder if I ever love her/ love my dad more all the time) ... Heheh ... Don't worry about the wedding, because u guys are my world ... There will be no wedding without u guys ...

It's a Tiring Day ...

I just arrived here at 4am this morning, then over slept for about 1hr caused me to arrive late at work ... It's fine the 1st few hours in the morning ... Then my day get worse as the day approaching to end ...

I was having a fight wif my future/soon to be ex bf, fighting for my freedom [I'll post about it later] ... Then I was hungry as I skipped lunch ... It's just pissed me off ... Made me wanna scream and create drama in the office ...

But no, it didn't happened ... Well you know me, I'm kind of a control freak ... Everything must go perfectly in my world ... The spelling, capital letters ... The 3dot (...), well spacing ... Haih ...

At the moment, my eyes feels like closing ... It's really hard for me to keep my eyes open, I'll be heading back right after I'm done wif this ...

This is another cry for attention post, yeahhhhhhhh ... Heheh, but I won't get into 'gedix' mood this time around ... It's more to B!+c#y this time ...

Oh, then I remembered my point ... Hahah, I'm fighting for my right at the moment ... The right of being happy, instead of making somebody else happy ... It's about time for me to get off my bad relationship, and it's time to find someone else for another chance instead of giving someone the 2nd chance (because it's not even 2nd chance anymore) ...

I can't love u anymore ...

Saham Tinggi Sgt ??

I lost a friend last year, somebody really close to me ... Who suddenly became distant caused by an incident ... Which I can say partially reflect reaction, but somehow under a steady mind, you should be able to control it ... Especially for a guy ...

I've been doing some mean things to him as well, I skipped his farewell party on purpose when he's leaving ... We'd stop talking to each other for quite a while, when a few months earlier we shared almost everything together ...

He's a close friend la, a good one ... Somehow, for a God knows why reason we just stopped talking ... It's not about that back couples months incident already, it's a new year ... We've carry on with our own life, at some point I've tried to be nice to him ...

I texted him (but he didn't received as he already deleted me from his bbm contact), I even say hi on fb (chat) ... Somehow he always came out wif 'bz' reasons ...

This is how we felt apart in the 1st place, he shown lack of interest ... So I back down, refuse to make fool of myself ... So here we go again, same attitude over the friendship I offered ...

Well, you know what ?? I'm done being nice to you ... Nak kate saham tinggi sgt, xkawen2 jugak kan ... So, go th wif all your ego monster inside ... I'm just trying to be nice, & have u as a friend ... Didn't expect to be close mcm dulu pun, but somehow I'm done trying ...

Xkuase nak layan noxxx ...

Sorry If I Never Mentioned U Here

I was browsing for blogger in quite extreme approach recently ... With the research on wedding prep and stuff ... Then I found this newly established (I assume) blog ... It's my ex-bf's ... Nothing to promote ere, sorry to say but it's boring ... Sorry, :D ...

There's phase, of me developing this page ... At some point, you can see that I'm confused ... Caught in the middle, between my emotions ... Good will to share my tots, & fulfilling reader's expectation ... But I guess, neither of it works (since my follower xsampai 10 [*_*]) ...

But there phase, when I'm too buzy ... With work or something else, then I don't have time to update ... So, maybe ... You're somebody in between that phases, that I forgot to mention ... It doesn't mean that I forgot everything about you ... It's just that, it's too much to pile it in one story... And there's new story come out each and every single day ... Left those not mentioned far2 behind ...

Wishlist 2011

I was trying to list down things i wish for next year, I'm very sure for every single thing I wish for ... I mean, realistically ... It's normally something I knew I can achieve, but need extra effort to make it true ...

For 2010, I successfully accomplished 6 out of 10 ... And those left in the list, are either things I don't really need by now ... Or, not much desired due to some others temptation ... Heheh ...

So, as I did last year ... I made enuf space for 10things, then I start filling those spaces ... Including one that I carry forward from 2010 ... Then I stuck at number 5., but the 9th and 10th wishes are already filled up (as it the things I wanted the most, and need extra x3 effort to achieve) ... Well, you know I love the drama ...

I found the 5th wishes a few mins later ...

So, at the moment I'm stuck with 3more wishes ... This made me realized, how lucky I am ... I have almost everything I wish for, stable career ... Loving bf, everything on the list was materials ...

Seriyesly, I'm running out of wish ?? Or maybe, I should wish for others joy & happiness ...

It's Gone ...

Hari ni hilang suda mood gedix & over exploiting, sebab perangai contracter yg mcm 'puaka' ... Just don't understand why orang Melayu ni still xnak maju kan diri sendiri ... Still berada di takuk yang lame, kalau takuk yang lame ... Xde la aku kesah sgt, ni lagi teruk dr what I used to receive ??

Seriously ?? My task ni, monthly report ... Can u imagine, doing the F'ing same thing ... Over n over again ?? Just tukar value, and check the details ... Make sure semua telly ... Memang ah, kene spend extra effort to focus ... But u've been here for 3years kot ?? Xkan xbole nak be good lagi in thing you did all these while ??

Seriously, xde mood dah nak finish the report ... While I shud have made it ready to be presented by tomorrow ... Haih, just tired la ... Being compared wif others, why org lain ade 2-3 report ... Bole jek siap on time, but my report yg satu always passed due date ...

Skali ok la, I gave reason to my boss I got late input ... 2x, 3x ?? I should already be able to handle the problem la ... Tapi masalah nyer skarang, it's human error all the way !!! I'm pissed ...

Cuti2 Malaysia ...

Mari sambung kegilaan tadi, hari ni memang giler ... Saye tido lambat mlm tadi, listing down things I need for my engagement ... Maybe sebab tu hari ni saye agak gedix ...

Dalam gedix2 pun, report saye siap ok ?? One of it ah, dah selamat di'forward' pd yg sepatutnya ...

Anyway, since 'Publicity Murahan' adalah mood utk minggu ini ... CUTI 5hari dah APPROVED !!! Yay !!!

Utk menyokong mood tersebut, saye serta kan gambar kucing omak den yg gedix ... Bukan omak den yg gedix, kucing die ... :D, sorry yea cik Tam2 ... Eh, puan ?? Anda pun dapat publicity murahan percuma minggu ini ...

Report2 ...

Ini adalah satu cubaan mengarut utk publicity murahan, rase nye ... Tu mood yg bole kite highlight kan utk minggu ini ...

Hahah, xpaham kenape saye sgt poyo skarang ... Yang sebenarnye, malu nak ckp ... Tapi ... SAYE DAH GATAL NAK KAWEN kot ... Hahah ...



Sebenarnye, saye tgh tension ... Carik pendrive xjumpe, softcopy sumer dlm tu ... Now stuck, xbuat pape ... Padahal sepanjang perjalanan ke sini last weekend dah b'azam xnak makan gaji bute lagi ...

Hahah, I'm a mess ... That's pile of work yg xsiap2, kalau chantek t'susun tu ... Makne nye saye buat keje, ;p ... Haih, pendrive ...