I'll Read This Post Every Time I'm Mad

I think I owe him this, actually dah bape intro saya buat utk introduce boipren tersayang kepada anda semua ... Tapi last2 tekan save jek, never publish ... Heheh ...

It's either contents terlalu memuji2, sampai ade part yg rase mcm tak real  ... Atau skill penulisan saye dah b'karat ... Diri sendiri bace pun menyampah ... Hahah ... A few post sebenarnya yg dah dirancang dlm kepala, tapi last2 save jugak ... So for now, forget the plan ... Saye tulis je la ape saye nak tulis ... Heheh ...

10 Things to Remind Myself Why I Love My Bf So Much

1. Gorgeous
He's a total 180 from my definition of handsome (tall, dark & handsome), somehow he's adorable ... Sangat jarang saye ade boipren yg putih melepak, but he's the exception ... Heheh ... Kalau mak aku tgk, confirm kene kutuk - jambu sgt ... X_X

Skali korang tgk, mcm anak ikan aku dah ... Hahahhahahah ... But actually he's older by few years, trust me ... I've checked his ic, ;p ... So biler dating kat pavi bawak my handbag kotak lepas keje, memang nampak cam bawak 'adik' gi shopping ... Hahah ...

2. Super Hot Programmer
I've seen him in action, he started his work after buka puasa ... & the system is done by 10 pm ... Saye tak habes main cityville lagi, keje die dah settle ... Skali dgn testing & commissioning ... Darling, that was super hot !!! Hahah ...

You know I how much I adore people who's doing well in their field of expertise, so yes ... This is one of his winning point, ;p ... Ok enuf, jgn puji lebih2 ...

3. He's in Control
Walaupun saye ni degil nak mampos, tapi sebenarnya in relationship I love to be instructed ... Mcm saye nak gi bersosial bersama teman2, gi Genting or where ever ... I love having someone to say no, but of course with a good reason ... Like I wanna go to Jakarta, while I don't have enough money to do so ... I love having someone to remind me of the consequences, walaupun sebenarnya bole pikir sendiri ;p ...

When I 1st met him, it was Sunday ... I have a date with someone else on the next coming Wednesday actually, he never really say I can't go ... But somehow he got the power to make me cancel the date ...

4. Rajin Dating
Dah tua2 ni, excited sebenarnya biler ade org ajak tgk wayang ... Hahahahhahah ... Kalau he's not busy, sure he'll be around for me ... Agak kerap sebenarnya kitorang dating, sampai my youngest brother pun tegur - "mcm slalu je dating" ... Hahah, jeles !!! ;p

5. Die Makan Je Ape Saya Masak
No matter ape pun saye masak, he never complaint ... Except for the part that my dinner always chicken jek ... Chicken soup, ayam madu ... Chicken, chicken ... Chicken !!! Haha, tipu la kan kalau everything's perfect ...

But he ate everything, dr cupcakes ... Sambal udang, all the chickens ... Hahah ... I almost made him makan kailan at one point, hahah ... He's a veggie hater, claim he'll throw up kalau makan sayur ... Word !!! ;p

6. He Drive to Damansara Biler Saye Gastric
He was super busy actually, that day I got gastric ... Tapi sebab dah kronik sgt, sampai minum 3x since 2pm & everything went out ... So terpaksa jugak menyusahkan die ... So he left his work, to drive me pegi klinik ... Dah la xsempat buka puasa, makan murtabak je ...

Sebab saye sakit, so bole request gi makan bubur kat Shah Alam ... Hahah ... Naseb la boipren nak membebel, jauh pun ... Tapi die bawak jugak, pastu die yg semangat lebih makan ... Hehe ...

7. Shopping Raya Bersama
Jarang sebenarnya, saya ada boipren yg busy with work ... Somehow ade mase to spend with me, hahah ... Am I complaining ?? Kekekkekekekeke ... Jakun ni sebenarnya ... Maybe seblom ni sumer long distance kot, tu la cam culture shock kejap biler dating 3x seminggu ...

Dalam kesibukan nak settle kan keje sblm raya ni, sempat lagi kitorang gi window shopping sampai Jalan TAR ... Kau ade ?? Hahahahahhahah ... Kitorang siap pusing 3x, sebab first round tu dah ternampak telekung yg cantik menarik tu ... Tapi gagah jugak nak gi survey sampai another end, so end up kene patah balik kat kedai mula2 ... Dgn sepenuh2 org kat Jalan TAR tu, & he can put up with that ...

8. Romantic Concern
He remembered the details, baju ape saye pakai when we met ... The pearl necklace I put on ... & he pays attention, I can call him tanye which colour of earrings he preferred ... & he'll make time to entertain me, mengade kan ?? Hahahahahah, tapi time nak raye hari tu jek la ... Kalau tiap2 kali beli baju ke, underware sumer nak call ... Itu bole mengundang kemarahan ... Hahahahhahhahah ...

He really pays attention, few weeks dating die dah well adapted to my habit of calling someone sementara tunggu engine kete panas on the way back from work ... Hahah ... Since last month was fasting month, biler saye tak call pukul 4stengah tu ... Nanti he'll complaint, hehe ... Every single moments/details matters to him ...

9. Communication is Easy
We declared almost everything, nak pakai baju ape ... Esok nak pegi mane, tgh hari lunch dgn saper ... & the list goes on ... I'm well informed of his work routine, so tade la saye risau & sebok nak call every hour ...

Even nak merajuk pun die bagitau, kekekekekekeke ... It actually work both ways ... Since it's easy to talk to each other, so we share almost everything ... Even I wanna go out lepak with my friends, xkire la lelaki ke perempuan ... I just have to tell him, like I said ... We lay everything on the table ...

10. It's Comfortable Being Around Each Other
When I'm stress, he knows the best how to deal wif that ... Of course I'm cranky & b!+c#y when I'm stress, somehow he'll manage to make me smile ... Siap tolong massage my neck, helping to ease the tense ... We never really have a fight, since he knows every cure to my problem ...

It's not easy for me to write this, I said million times ... Nothing is perfect ... At the moment I'm struggling with the attentions, since I'm a sucker for that one ... So when he's not around, it's hard for me to fight the attentions from others ...

I'm dealing with myself je sebenarnya, I think too much about people's perceptions ... Since everybody's concern kenapa asyik tukar boipren, & not to forget those who can't move on ... Said don't give a damn about me, somehow go every level to get my attention ...

My advice, move on la haters ... Seriously, giving advice to those people don't feel worth it pun ... It's better for me to care more on myself, rather than trying to fix their twisted mind ... Enuf said, life's good for me so far ... Enough to make me sticking to my roots ...

I'm happy, & blessed ... Till then ~

Lost of Rhythm

Recently ni raser cam I lost my skill to write, sumer type separuh jalan ... Pastu, jadik pekasam dlm draft ... Hahah ... Kenape, kenape ?? Haha, sebab I know well ade org yg extra concern ... So malas nak updet ... Bole eh ?? Hahah ...

But that has to go, saye tulis blog bukan utk awak sorang je bace ... Org lain pun bole bace, other people with the right purpose of knowing ... & bukan sebab sebok nak tau hal org ... Kalau awak nak tau my updets, bbm je la ... Kompem saye reply, haha ... Yakin je kau kan, ;p ...

Kadang2 terpikir jugak, raser mcm saye tulis entry sampah jek ... Xbest pun, entry org lain lagi best ... Lagi meletops, gambar lagi cantek ... Materials lagi mahal, serba serbi lebih menarik la dr ape yg saye papar kan ... Ceh2, ayat ...

But then I realize ... Kenape, kenape ... Kenape ?? Sebab saye share ape real life has to offer kot ?? Ape yg average people can afford, something wearable & tak over the top ... Or how much an average 2years experience exec can spend on her baju raya, bukan nye baju designer yg riban2 mcm nak gi shooting program raye ;p ...

I shared info about what normal people can expect for some range of cost, for a tailor made baju kurung moden ... Which tailor can offer a better workmanship, either the tailor hanya femes pd nama or it is worth every single cents you spend ... Since duit tak tumbuh from pokok depan rumah, & you work you S day & night to have what you want ...

Sorry if I disappoint you guys, my dear readers ... Saya tak tulis blog fashion, nor a good reference for wedding preps ... It's just a blog with entries on how I survive, managing my time-money & attention ... Utk kesekian kali nya, thank you for reading ...

I promise I'll try my best to stick to my roots, utk tidak berubah pendirian dan terpengaruh dengan arus penulisan blog ... Haha, ape aku merepek ni ... My point is, I'll stick to writing things I experience in my daily life ... Bukannya life style of rich & femes kalau aku kawen dgn anak datuk ni atau anak tan sri tu ... Keekekekekkeke ...

Meh, hugs ... Hihi ~

Oh Baju Raya: Part II

Sila baca entry terdahulu utk mengelakkan perasaan syok sendiri dlm diri anda, hehe ... Mengade nak link, padahal tade post lain pun in between ... ;p Anyway, setelah berbulan lamanya hati ini berbelah bagi nak hantar baju raye kat mane utk tailor made baju kurung ... Akhirnya (setelah ade duit gaji nak letak deposit, ;p) saya membuat keputusan utk menghantar kain tu kat butik paling dekat dgn rumah ... Hehe ...

Yes, baju raya lepas raya tu saya hantar kat Rico Rinaldi ... Tade beading, tade patching ... & he quoted for a surprisingly reasonable price, cukup utk menarik minat saya utk hantar 8pasang baju lagi kat die :D ... Nak tahu, sila email saya ... Lupe plak nak ambek gambar the material before hand it over kat his boutique hari tu ... Tunggu output je la kan ?? Hihi ...

As I walked in, akak2 tgh jahit manik kat boutique tu cam risau giler tengok saya bawak kain nak tempah baju dengan muka penuh harapan nak raye ... Since seminggu lagi nak raye kot, haha ... Then when I said, "Tape2, lepas raya baru ambek pun takpe" ... Baru la masing2 rilek sikit, haha ...

Ikut perjanjian, baju saye akan siap by end of September ... Yay, heh ... Kire baju raya haji la tu ... Tibe2 raser cam gatal nak hantar kain chiffon yg beli kat Jakel time konon2 nak b'tunang dulu, ;p ... Wahhh, memang duit tumbuh kat pokok depan rumah la kan ?? Sumer nak hantar kat designer ...

Tape, yg tu tgk keperluan dulu ... Maybe bole consider for raya next year, bole I'll took early action for raya next year ... May dah pegi tempah baju siap2, hahah ... Semangat ... At the moment ade satu lagi project ... Which is nak insert beads kat baju di bawah ini ... Sila abaikan muka tak siap itu, heh ...

Sebab rase cam pale sgt, need something2 that can popup ... Giler mengade ... Hahah ... Maybe nak hantar kat butik ibu Encik Faliq, since penah hantar one piece back in 2010 ... Tapi mase tu, kirim kat despatch je ... Now kene pegi carik sendiri ... Hehe ...

Mcm dah merepek je, kbye ~

Oh Baju Raya

I have this one beautiful piece, some kind of kasa rubiah nak hantar pegi tailor for hari raya ... At the moment tak tau nak hantar kat mane, it's a choice between satisfactory & price ... Because daddie bought kain tu from India, it's a really nice piece kalau turned out well at the end of the day ...

I had the experience dgn dzul de classique, walaupun sejengkal jek dr rumah ... The answer is still NO ... Lagi la this piece memang fully embroidered - dekat collar, the bottom piece & for the hand ... So is a big NO, sebab the last time my silk dgn design kaki was disaster ... There's 2pieces, both memang hancus ... & it's clear that I'm still traumatised, haha ...

Then there's lovely auntie kat Tum's Tailor, Seksyen 9 Bandar Baru Bangi ... Which is, nice ... But do expect tailor's workmanship, sebab name pun tailor kan ... Once when I took my lace & satin to her for my bride's maid dress, makcik tu yg suh aku gi hantar kat designer ... Hahah ... Seriously, that's how I end up sending that dress to a designer ...

Then of course, the designer - Rico Rinaldi ... It is really nice to deal with him, but my budget is tight for these few months ... Heh ... Let the picture speak, you guys judge ... Sorry my photography skill memang sampah ... Haha ...

the dress minus heels ~

Another option was my tailor in Tangkak, Johor ... Tapi mcm jauh sgt, to send & pick up dah bape ringgit ... Pastu I don't really like the finishing she did for my previous baju kurung ... Further more, cehhh ... Mcm buat surat rasmi in English time skolah plak ... Hahah ... Anyway, I got this expectation to make this dress well fitted ... So my body nampak cam ala2 hour glass gituew ... Hahah, giler gedix ...

Konon2 nak camni la - source

Tibe2 rase nak send to the one paling dekat dengan rumah, since kalau hantar area kajang pun dah almost 4hundred sebab ade lining ... Wahhh, money please grow on the tree kat depan rumah !!!

Output ----> http://personalrey.blogspot.com/2012/11/wordless-wednesday-1.html

I'm Waiting for a Train ...

You're waiting for a train, a train that will take you far away. You know where you hope this train will take you, but you don't know for sure. But it doesn't matter, because we'll be together.

Haha, giler poyo ... Tujuan sebenar nak bagitau I'm bored as hell dalam office ni ... Since tomorrow will be my last day in the office, & sebab dah tender resignation letter ... Yes, I'm resigning by the end of the month ... Which is end of this week .. So I don't got any task since then, dah tak tau nak buat ni ...

I dunno, to some people ... Resignation tu cam a huge thing, mcm making decision nak kawen ... Back then when I moved back from Kerteh pun, ade la jugak rase sayu2 sket nak pindah KL ... Hahah ... But this time around, I just feel like it's a routine ... Something that I have to do ...

I resign atas tiket 'masalah kesihatan' ... Which is bukan la tak bole jalan ke hape, but my attendance was down hill ... Few days earlier, dengan azam & semangat berkobar-kobar ... I leave home around 6.45am since Monday, for 2days in a row ... Going back home yesterday, I dah bole raser my body tak sedap ... Mcm nak demam ...

I end up waking up at 7am this morning, I leave home before 8 ... Naseb Sungai Besi tak jem giler this morning, so I manage to reach the office ngam2 9am ... Berjaya jugak mengekalkan record above the red line for this week, yeahhh ...

My feet is freezing at the moment, as I'm sitting here writing this ... My point is, I'm still pushing myself to do things beyond my capability ... Sebab my mum sumer advised me not to push myself, since they know how I've been living my life all these while ...

For instance aku ade order cupcakes on Tuesday, balik keje from Subang I'll go shopping siap2 before I went back ... Sampai rumah around 8, get simple dinner then start baking ... Depends on flavour, kalau dorang request yg filling2 tu leceh sikit la my work ... & will take longer time, normally everything will be done around mid night ...

Then I'll wake early the day after, & keje mcm biase ... Whenever I got time to replace my sleep, then I'll do ... Even there are times when my mood swing dah start to go crazy, my sister will ask - "Kau dah tido ke belum" ?? Yup, that's so me ... So after this medical condition, I was advised not to do those kind of things ... I have to love my body, pamper myself ...

Pamper dalam konteks berikut bukan la bermaksud aku nak pegi spa every week, it's just that I'm doing things that my body can actually do ... Bukan minum red bull, kacip patimah bagai cam dulu ... Reason being - my oven is still working, & I have plan to make babies in this oven body ... So yes, people bole cakap ikut sedap mulut dorang ... "Ala, akak tu ok jek lepas operation" or "Minah tu xde pun mcm tu dulu" ... But this is my body, my future ... So, I'll decide what I can do & what I can't ...

"You know where you hope this train will take you, but you don't know for sure" ... I do have plans for the future, what I don't know is that will it work or not ... All I can do is work hard to carry out my plans, & pray for the best to happen ...

So, before my service ended here ... I would like to thank everybody for their  help & kindness, selama saya bekerja di sini ... & I'm sorry if I ever do anything wrong to any of you guys ... It's been nice working with everybody here, I'll take all the sweet memories with me & left the unwanted behind ... Hehe, esok aku post kat wall group ... No worries ...

Till then, wish me luck !!!

Lie, Make it Real ... If it Doesn't Work, Blame Someone ...

Recently a major drama exploded among my circle of friends ... Korang pun tau, kawan aku bukan ramai sgt pun kan ?? I have no intention of revealing the details, sebab from my point of view ... It's something huge, maruah kau ... Maruah family kau ... & I'm not God to punish you ... It's all on you baby, you decide on your own all those things you did ...

No need to explain myself, neither to cover my S ... I apologized for things I did wrong, & I won't apologized for things I believe I do right ... Especially in something related to my religion, there's no tolerance in that ... Memang aku bukan baik sangat pun, but I know what's right & what's wrong ...

What you guys do is actually the same, you both created a lie ... & build more lies around your story to make people (or maybe yourself too) believe your lie is REAL ... So I stand strongly by my principle, I won't lie for any of you ... Friends or not, you shouldn't put anyone in the position to choose ...

Leave all those others out side the picture, just between me & you ... We both know who the hell is lying ... I choose to stay silent in this drama, & it's not like it's a kiss & tell contest ... I'm not going to trash her, just to make you feel better ... It's a sincere apology, just that ... So don't get ahead of yourself ...

I have a lot to say, since I've lost a lot for the past couples years ... But it's just not right to channel my anger publicly, even some other people already did - trash every single aspect of my life publicly ... They said 'God will do all the punishment for you, & if your lucky enough ... You'll be around to see how they got punished' ...

Just like what happened recently to someone who broke my heart, God took something from him as well ... & I'm lucky enough to have someone told me he lost that one thing he put all his faith in ... Sounds evil kan ?? But just don't be the reason for any of the bad things happened ...

p/s: find someone else to blame next time you come around a problem & stumble ... You did a fine job pointing finger for the past few events ~

Weddings-Marriage Personally

I've been attending weddings every fortnightly on average since last year, especially on school holidays ... Being in kk on 1 of my best friend's anniversary, light up the memories we had a year back ... Dulu kecik2, I attended weddings ikut my parents ... When I was little, I enjoyed it very much when they let the kids to put on 'inai' ... & I really2 love taking photos with the bride, REALLY ... Sampai jumpe bride yg tak kenal kat hotel lobby pun, I'll ask my mum to snap a photo for me ...

When u're a teenagers, u prefer to hangout with ur friends on weekends rather than following ur parents to weddings ... & during that transition from teenagers to a grown up women, weddings are something interesting to take part in ... Especially close friend's, since ur grew up together ... & it's interesting to be a part of one of their important event throughout ur stages in life ...

As a women, we always look forward on the wedding ... What u're going to wear, how you want your hair done ... U wanna find the perfect shoes to compliment the outfit, you go all around the city to find the right hand bouquet that will stand out ... For me ?? I would like a perfect husband to fit in all the beautiful details, yes ... I am that selfish, ;p ... But then u realize, that it's not that simple ...

Someone that look good, might not be so perfect to share your life with ... Because of different interests, & financial capability probably ... Someone who can make you happy, might not provide you the kind of wedding/life you've been dreaming of since you're little ... But someone who can give you all, might just not make you happy ... Maybe he'll spend more time on work, instead of spending time wif you ...

My opinion personally, it's something you tolerate when you decided to get married ... Quoted from a friend - "If I'm not that religious & have no family to care about, I would have marry the other guy who can give me almost everything" ... But she married the person she loves instead, & tolerate long distance marriage some more ...

While for me ?? Some might argue my current bf's capability, but I always refer back to my roots ... Pesan Nabi Muhammad SAW, pilih pasangan b'dasar kan 4 perkara - harta, keturunan, rupa paras & agama ... Tapi pilih agama, nescaya kamu akan bahagia ... My bf memang xbole nak provide harta walaupun die ensem, or b'kelakuan baik2 to be the ideal future husband ... But I can simply argue a topic, & he'll came in strong & clear on hukum ... Complete with the exact arabic term for the situation ...

That's what made him on the top of my list ... No matter what other people think or say ... So where do you stand in this argument ?? Will u marry your sweetheart even it's clear he can't provide u financially or spiritually, or a guy struggling to give you the best he could provide but somehow guide u to a better life each & every single day ... Or u prefer someone who drives sports cars, but spend 2hrs a day wif u because he's busy all day chasing business deal ...

For whatever you choose to prioritize, the most important thing is to deal with it ... You should well aware of those choices u made when u go for ur bridal gown fitting, prepare your mind & soul for the ups & downs in marriage when u pick up your wedding rings at the jewelry store ... & don't forget to pray & ask for guidance along the way, & seek for help when u come into obstacle instead of running away ...

As much as I love weddings, that's how much I adore my happily married friends ... Lots of luv ~

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Pack & Leave

We always said - as we grow older, things get complicated ... It is, but I just realize that I have this one thing I can go easy ... Or in other words, something that might be complicated for others ... But I'm good at it, which is - pack & leave ...

Some people find it difficult, to leave home ... To work hundred miles away from home, married or single ... Then I realize how fast things went back then in 2010, when I decided to leave home & work in Kerteh ... It was like, I went for interview on Friday ... Get on the plane for a week long vacation in KK, went back beli tilam kat ikea wif my former bf ... & leave at 4am in the morning on the next Monday dgn Ahmad Faliq ...

Even when I told my dad, "I'll leave for Kerteh the moment we get back from KK, if I get the job" ... My dad kind of shock to hear that, but for me it was easy ... By that I mean, I don't get sentimental packing my things & leave ... Maybe sebab I was trained dr kecik2, since my dad travel around the country for his work ... Imagine he gave 2hrs notice to pack, when we're moving from Tawau to Papar ...

Somehow, to move back from Kerteh to Bangi ... I got emotional packing my things ... Haha ... Maybe because every single thing in the house are personally mine, compared to those in my parent's house which are mostly shared ...

So, here I am now ... About to do the same thing, pack & leave ... Honestly ?? I'm excited, to get my own place ... & get committed to my job ... Just like back then in Kerteh, keje ... Go back home, tgk astro ... Sleep, & the repeat that routine everyday ...

Bf ?? Kalau bole masuk bag bungkus, I'm pretty sure I will ... Haha ... But that's not the point now, I'm not worried about 'hanging on' to my bf ... Because to me, bf is not a husband ... Yet ... But it got me thiking, what will happen when I'm married ?? Will I still be packing my things & leave for my job, from my own judgment at the moment - YES ... I'll definitely do the same thing, pack my things ... Grab my kids, transfer them to my new job place ...

But will that do justice to my partner ?? I think I'll be very lucky to have a partner who agreed with my career plan, but chances are ?? It's quite impossible to find someone who can just find a new job somewhere else, every time I move for a new project aite ?? Unless I get married to a teacher, tu pun jarang nak dgr a male teacher mintak tukar skolah sebab nak ikut wife kan ??

All these, just reminded me that I had a long way to go in planning my future ... More things to take into consideration, more responsibilities ... Right now I should just focus on my work, dr looking forward on planning for things that wasn't sure ... Pour my effort on things more important than thinking, whether my future husband will fit right in my plan ...

Oh, btw ... I haven't get back to work since my surgery, feeling a little bit under the weather these few days ... Right now, susah nak predict either I can stay fit for the whole week or not since I can easily get tired after an outing depend on how much energy I spent ... & staying out over night is the most likely activity that can cause the pain to re-occurred ... I might have to go back to the clinic to get things check up & extend my medical leave ... Hihi ... Till then ~

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