Monday, January 14, 2013

Breathe: Part II

I'm suppose to write about stone head aka papa chicken in this next post, tapi cam nak sambung membebel pasal my job ... Haha ... Btw, reading blog from bold 5 adalah awesome !!! Haha ... But I'm planning to get myself iPhone 5 anyway :D ... Work sucks, it still sucks ... I've sacrificed my visit to 'akar' last nite, sebab pk I wanna put 250% on work today ... Since my leave will start tomorrow, somehow they still find ways to get me fucked up ...

'They' in the picture is 2 losers, which clearly with balls ... Small balls maybe ... Since you know la my nature of work kan ... Anti-feminism, maybe ?? I woke up this morning with a positive attitude, even it's not really +ve actually ... I got up from bed with the idea - I grew up to be the mean girl, why am I letting myself to be bullied ?? I got this bubbly personality, & a pleasant look that make things easy for me ...

Memang la aku slalu ckp, it's not the look that get me the job ... But the look definitely give me an easy pass, to book a place in the interview sessions ... Then the rest is how I sell myself to the interviewer ... Meaning, nobody likes the kind of impression on blondes aite ?? What I'm saying, beauty means nothing without brain ... Ok, I'm explaining myself upon declaring I have a pleasant look ... Which is not necessary, since aku dah merepek nak divert the fact that I said so ... Lol ~

It's just that, there's one thing my dad used to say when I was little - "muke cantek, tapi perangai tak elok nak buat ape" ... I think he said that when I was 12, somehow it nailed in my mind all these while ... Tade hubung kait dgn my point in 3rd paragraph, haha ... But my point is, dah la muka pecah ... Perangai cam haram plak ... At least let people say, 'harap muke jek hensem, perangai ntah pape' ... Or, 'biar muke tak hensem ... Jgn busuk hati' ... Get it ??

So let's go back to the story about those 2idiots with no balls ... I've promised myself not to let them ruin my day, no matter what ... Because they're the losers, & not me ... Just because at some part, things went easy for me ... It doesn't mean that I didn't put any effort in it, & lemme tell you ... Those idiots are really trying to ruin my day, almost everyday ... It always like, I shud help him keep up ... Somehow, he will never help in making things easy for me ... Unfair ?? Standard la, keje dgn typical melayu ...

Contoh senang - we're both teachers ... Aku cikgu lukisan kejuruteraan, jantan bengong tu cikgu math ... Let say he's absent, I help attend his class ... Suh la, the student die buat math homework kalau aku malas nak study the syllabus ... Kalau aku rajin, bole la aku ajar bebudak tu fraction or probability ... Something easy, no brainer for me ... But then if he's the one taking over my class, mampus die biar je student aku layan bbm/angry bird & sebagainya dlm lab LK since he claim he knows nothing about technical ... Nampak board dgn T-square je, mengalabah beruk ... Metaphorically ...

So yeah, I won't let those bastards ruin my day any longer ... Nak marah, or get me fucked up ... Let them be, I'll stay positive & run the rest of the day without letting them bring down my self esteem ... Memang aku hari2 pegi office consultant tu utk kene maki, but the best part is that - my team (by that I mean 'someone' doing about the same role, share equal power & responsibilities - obviously that loser wif no balls la kan) is not really helping in making things better for me ...

So what if I can get things done easy ?? Quoted from one of the no ballers pun, "u senyum2 sikit je, dorang sign" ... So what ?? That's a gift, that make things easy for me ... Why do you have to be jealous ?? Try everything to make things hard for me ?? Rezeki masing2 kan ?? Like I always say, 'Kalau kau memang bagus, kau tetap bagus jugak ... No matter if you're surrounded by other great persons, you'll always be great' ... So it will be not necessary to bring down your colleagues ...

Talking about bully ni, dulu pun same jugak ... I used to call my draftsman pussy, haha ... I was so tough at that moment, that I manage to stand up to 2 mentally retarded guy ... At the end of the day I did make it up with one of them, siap bole mengumpat the other guy same2 ... Yeah, it ended up wif drama baling bookshelf ... But I think we cud duduk satu meja, lepak minum one day ... Even I do have a police report against him, hehe ...

I can feel my points is all over the place dah ni, hahah ... So let's conclude this - don't ever break for those bullies ... Die nak campak ur paperwork on the floor, or torn them into pieces ... Let them be ... I've been thru that, there's no shame to me & I admit ... There are times when I came back to my office & cry in the toilet sebab stress sgt ... But never, ever give give up ... Never let them bring you down, don't ever torture yourself mentally for these kind of bully ...

I got screamed almost everyday, like I have no feelings ... Pretend to be an idiot, because he need to know he knows it all ... At some point, when they ask me a question ... It's better for me to say 'I dunno', rather than voice out my opinion since they're going to say I'm wrong anyway ... But never, I cracked in front of them ... Or go back to my desk & draft a resigning letter right after ... So yeah, stand up for yourself & face the bullies ... If you're not brave enuf to voice it out, at least prepare yourself mentally & never let anything bring your self esteem down ...

Till then ~

Ps: my boss informed me that I'm gonna be transfered due to this 'irreconcilable differences' by end of the day ... I always say, 'don't mix my personal life with work' ... But trust me, at the end of the day it'll always come down to - nothing is personal ...

I'll update on another part of breathe for my recent status soon, sabar2 ... Hihi ...

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